Just replacing words and saying “see what this reminds you now of!” doesn't work, because the words might not type-match. Otherwise you could replace some words in any atheist speech and say “now that looks like a religion!”

Moreover, you miss the point. It's not that sex is bad or non-important or should be discouraged or whatever.

  • Not having sex and feeling unhappy about it is strictly worse than not having sex and being ok with it.
  • Believing that men deserve sex (whatever that means), women owe men sex, it's women's duty to satisfy men's want for sex, it's women's fault that men have less sex and so on is irrational, as in it's meaningless epistemologically and consequentially.
  • If we accept CBT, these beliefs are actually what cause depression, anxiety, and other psychological problems.
  • Sex is not a need, as in people don't die without it, and it's questionable if lack of sex causes any irreparable psychological damage.
  • Even if it causes certain psychological damage, it most likely happens under certain conditions, which might be easy to avoid.
  • Having low self-esteem about lack of sex doesn't necessarily increase sex.
  • Having sex doesn't necessarily solve insecurities and anxieties concerning sex.

Not having sex and feeling unhappy about it is strictly worse than not having sex and being ok with it.

Except that feeling unhappy about it makes one more likely to fix the situation. Seriously, this is the exact same argument made by deathists, and generally a universal argument against caring about anything.

Rational approach to finding life partners

by c_edwards 1 min read16th Aug 2015128 comments


Speaking from personal experience, finding the right relationship can be HARD. I recently came across a rational take on finding relationship partners, much of which really resonated with my experiences:




(I'm still working my way through the Sequences, and lw has more than eight thousand articles with "relationship" in them. I'm not promising the linked articles include unique information)