Totally can relate to this. I was dealing with depression long before LW, but improved rationality sure made my depression much more fun and exciting. Sarcastically, I could say that LW gave me the tools to be really good at self-criticism.
I can't exactly give you any advice on this, as I'm still dealing with this myself and I honestly don't really know what works or even what the goal exactly is. Just wanted to say that the feeling "this compromise 'have some fun now' crap shouldn't be necessary if I really were rational!" is only too familiar.
It lead me to constantly question my own values and how much I was merely signalling (mostly to myself). Like, "if I procrastinate on $goal or if I don't enjoy doing $maximally_effective_but_boring_activity, then I probably don't really want $goal", but that just leads into deeper madness. And even when I understand (from results, mostly, or comparisons to more effective people) that I must be doing something wrong, I break down until I can exactly identify what it is. So I self-optimize so that I can be better at self-optimizing, but I never get around to doing anything.
(That's not to say that LW was overall a negative influence for me. Quite the opposite. It's just that adding powerful cognitive tools to a not-too-sane mind has a lot of nasty side-effects.)
"if I procrastinate on $goal or if I don't enjoy doing $maximallyeffectivebutboringactivity, then I probably don't really want $goal", but that just leads into deeper madness.
If I understood this correctly (as you procrastinating on something, and concluding that you don't actually want it), then most people around here call that akrasia.
Which isn't really something to go mad about. Basically, your brain is a stapled together hodgepodge of systems which barely work together well enough to have worked in the ancestral environment.
Nowadays, we k...
So after reading SarahC's latest post I noticed that she's gotten a lot out of rationality.
More importantly, she got different things out of it than I have.
Off the top of my head, I've learned...
Where she got...
I've only recently making a habit out of trying new things, and that's been going really well for me. Is there other low hanging fruit that I'm missing?
What cool/important/useful things has rationality gotten you?