If you care to explain why, please do so.
Sure.
The easiest way to get at it is with an example.
Suppose I decide I want my coworkers to visit my desk more often at work, and therefore begin a practice of smiling at everyone who visits, keeping treats on my desk and inviting visitors to partake, being nicer to people when they visit me at my desk than I am at other times, and otherwise setting up a schedule of differential reinforcement designed to increase the incidence of desk-visiting behavior, and I do all of that without ever announcing to anyone that I'm doing it or why I'm doing it, let alone securing anyone's consent. (Let alone securing everyone's consent.)
Do you consider that an example of unethical behavior? I don't.
Now, maybe you don't either. Maybe it's "obviously" not an example of manipulating the behavior of other people by means other than convincing them that they should behave in a certain way. I don't really know, since you've declined to clarify your constraints. But it sure does seem to match what you described.
Do you consider that an example of unethical behavior? I don't.
You're right that this doesn't seem quite unethical, but it is awfully creepy and I'm not sure how to pull my intuitions apart there. Sitting across from someone who is faking affection and smiles and pleasantries so as to manipulate my behavior would cause me to avoid them like the plague.
In professional environments I find this happens all the time, and when the fake friendliness is discovered as such, the effect reverses considerably. If it's terribly important to something's being effective that the person you're doing it to doesn't know what's going on, it's probably bad.
Part of the sequence: The Science of Winning at Life
Also see: Basics of Animal Reinforcement, Basics of Human Reinforcement, Physical and Mental Behavior, Wanting vs. Liking Revisited, Approving reinforces low-effort behaviors, Applying Behavioral Psychology on Myself.
Story 1:
On Skype with Eliezer, I said: "Eliezer, you've been unusually pleasant these past three weeks. I'm really happy to see that, and moreover, it increases my probability than an Eliezer-led FAI research team will work. What caused this change, do you think?"
Eliezer replied: "Well, three weeks ago I was working with Anna and Alicorn, and every time I said something nice they fed me an M&M."
Story 2:
I once witnessed a worker who hated keeping a work log because it was only used "against" him. His supervisor would call to say "Why did you spend so much time on that?" or "Why isn't this done yet?" but never "I saw you handled X, great job!" Not surprisingly, he often "forgot" to fill out his worklog.
Ever since I got everyone at the Singularity Institute to keep work logs, I've tried to avoid connections between "concerned" feedback and staff work logs, and instead take time to comment positively on things I see in those work logs.
Story 3:
Chatting with Eliezer, I said, "Eliezer, I get the sense that I've inadvertently caused you to be slightly averse to talking to me. Maybe because we disagree on so many things, or something?"
Eliezer's reply was: "No, it's much simpler. Our conversations usually run longer than our previously set deadline, so whenever I finish talking with you I feel drained and slightly cranky."
Now I finish our conversations on time.
Story 4:
A major Singularity Institute donor recently said to me: "By the way, I decided that every time I donate to the Singularity Institute, I'll set aside an additional 5% for myself to do fun things with, as a motivation to donate."
The power of reinforcement
It's amazing to me how consistently we fail to take advantage of the power of reinforcement.
Maybe it's because behaviorist techniques like reinforcement feel like they don't respect human agency enough. But if you aren't treating humans more like animals than most people are, then you're modeling humans poorly.
You are not an agenty homunculus "corrupted" by heuristics and biases. You just are heuristics and biases. And you respond to reinforcement, because most of your motivation systems still work like the motivation systems of other animals.
A quick reminder of what you learned in high school
What works
Example applications
For additional examples and studies, see The Power of Reinforcement (2004), Don't Shoot the Dog (2006), and Learning and Behavior (2008).
I close with Story 5, from Amy Sutherland:
Next post: Rational Romantic Relationships Part 1
Previous post: The Good News of Situationist Psychology
My thanks to Erica Edelman for doing much of the research for this post.