Joe6

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Emotional Involvement

This discussion reminds me of "Infinite Jest" by David Foster Wallace. One of the themes of the book is something like "be careful what you choose to love", which could be re-phrased "be careful what emotions you bind where".

Whither OB?

I'm not familiar with all the different community software out there, but Slash fits your criteria.

http://www.slashcode.com/about.shtml