Should we align AI with maternal instinct?
Epistemic status: Philosophical argument. I'm critiquing Hinton's maternal instinct metaphor and proposing relationship-building as a better framework for thinking about alignment. This is about shifting conceptual foundations, not technical implementations. -- Geoffery Hinton recently argued that since AI will become more intelligent than humans, traditional dominance-submission models won't work for alignment. Instead, he suggests we might try building "maternal instincts" into AI systems, so they develop genuine compassion and care for humans. He offers the mother-baby relationship as the only example we have of a more intelligent being "controlled" by a less intelligent one. I don't buy this - for starters, it is not clear that mothers are always more intelligent than their babies, and it is also not clear that it is always the babies that control their mothers. And I'm just scratching the surface here. Most AI alignment discourse still revolves around control mechanisms, oversight protocols, and reward functions, as though alignment were an engineering puzzle to be solved through clever constraints. Some of the stalwarts in the field like Hinton and others are finally seeing that alignment is a relational problem. Personally, that is immensely validating for the ideas I've had as an outsider about AI ever since I started thinking. I am glad that this field is finally looking for insights from others - neuroscientists, psychologists, philosophers, etc, who've been studying the human condition, intelligence and relationships from other perspectives that might potentially add to the study of neural networks. This shift towards a relational approach matters. As for Hinton's specific metaphor (maternal instinct), it makes me uneasy. The idea that mothers are endlessly selfless, forever attuned to every cry, governed by an unshakable instinct to nurture, is not rooted in lived reality, it a stereotype (if not a fantasy). As a mother of two myself, I know th
Wow, thank you for sharing that. I can definitely relate. There is something genuinely beautiful about beginner mistakes when learning a new language. They build confidence through small failures and repeated repair. By avoiding them, it can feel like progress, like we’re making room for more sophisticated mistakes. But I worry we’re skipping the stage where confidence is built sustainably, especially in something that is genuinely hard for adults.