Actually updating can be harder than it seems. Hearing the same advice from other people and only really understanding it the third time (though internally you felt like you really understood the first time) seems inefficient. Having to give yourself the same advice or have the same conversation with yourself over and over again also seems pretty inefficient. Recently, I’ve had significant progress with actually causing internal shifts, and the advice.. Well, you’ve probably heard it before. But hopefully, this time you’ll really get it.

Signs you might not be actually updating.

You do some focusing, and you discover a problem and you talk to a part of yourself and work through it. Then a week later, you find yourself having the same conversation with that part of you.
You change your mind about doing something but find that suspiciously your behaviour is not changing or doesn’t change for that long.
Someone says “X” and you go “oh yes, X”. Then, some time passes. Then someone else says “X” and you go “ohhh yes, X, now I get it”. Then, some time passes. Then someone else says “X” and you go “ohhhh yes of course, X, now I really get it”. Etc.
You feel like you believe X but yet keep finding yourself behaving as though you don’t believe X.
You feel like your rationalisations are running so deep that you can’t seem to catch them. You're doing things that seem to make sense but then something might happen that makes you feel like your behaviour was actually driven by a 'rationalisation'. To make this clearer, imagine something happens (event Y) that changes your opinion of X. Maybe you realise that the thing 'shouldn't' be much evidence at all. You decide it will only slightly affect your opinion. You may end up with a certain conclusion by looking at old evidence and this thing Y (that you have actively decided to only weight a small amount). Then, something may then happen that makes you really believe that thing Y is small evidence. Suddenly, you are looking at the same evidence and this thing Y (weighted the same amount as you tried to weight it before), but you have a different conclusion. It's like you are looking at the evidence through a different 'lens'. It seems like you are able to exploit uncertainty around evidence to get differing conclusions depending on this 'lens'. This whole thing might ma

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