Most people believe they want truth — but what we really want is to feel right.
Being right gives us a hit of confidence, control, and even social approval. It feels good to win an argument, even when we quietly suspect we might be missing something.

This need to protect our sense of “rightness” runs deep. It’s wired into the brain’s reward system. Studies show that when we get information that confirms our beliefs, the same pleasure centers light up as when we eat something sweet or receive money.
So being right isn’t just about logic — it’s about dopamine.

The downside is obvious: once our brain labels a belief as “part of who I am,” new evidence starts to feel like a personal attack. That’s why debates rarely change minds — they just make people dig deeper into their original positions.

Rationality, then, isn’t about being right all the time. It’s about learning to notice when we’re wrong faster than others. It’s about treating truth as a moving target, not a trophy.

A simple mental habit helps: when someone disagrees with you, instead of defending, ask,

“What would make you change your mind?”
and then ask yourself the same question.

If you can answer honestly, you’re already thinking more rationally than most people.