This was a Facebook post, which I decided I wanted in some kind of blog form. Requires at least some familiarity with WarCraft. Relevant to those who have sought the Sword of Good and Heard the Scream. (Obviously not suited for the front-page, although more LW-relevant than I was expecting when I started writing)
The new WarCraft expansion cinematic punches me right in the "what the fuck is wrong with you people, you have just spent 10 years learning to work together against world-ending horrors can you not spent 5 FUCKING SECONDS chilling out before going to war again?"
Also punches me in the feels.
When I ranted about this to my girlfriend, she said "they just finished stopping a Big Bad together and now they're back to infighting? Honestly... that sounds pretty realistic."
And I briefly reflect upon history... and, sure. Okay. Humans are in fact shitty, and metaphorical stand-ins for humans are shitty too.
Geopolitical stability is hard. Giant war machines are going to lobby to keep being useful. People are going to want to reclaim their ancestral homeland and the new people living in that ancestral homeland are going to be upset. Par for the course.
Fine.
But, Sylvannas and Anduin are specific individual people with history and agency and shit. Why are they leading the charge in this pointless cycle of violence?
[Shoulder-Cynic says "Really, you have faith in individuals at the top of giant geopolitical war machines to not warp themselves in the face of social pressure to do the things their angsty, riled up fellows want, at least some of whom might be powerful enough to take command if the king slipped?"]
Well, when you put it that way, no, I don't. But...
[Shoulder-Scientist says "did you actually explore hypothesis space and form probability distributions before getting mad at the artistic directors?"]
...no.
[Shoulder-Different-Cynic says "Sure, it's boring that War Never Changes and that the Horde and Alliance haven't gotten over their bullshit in 25 years. But, how long do you observe Real World Powers taking to get over their bullshit?]
But, they just literally killed Satan together!
[And Russia and the Allied folk killed Hitler together. How'd that work out?]
Okay. When I stop, and think about what the World of Azeroth is actually like, and what pressures Anduin and Sylvannas are probably under... there's actually a fairly reasonable interpretation of what's going on here.
I imagine refugees from Lordaeron clamoring to return to their home, threatening civil war if they can't. I imagine Anduin trying earnestly to do the right thing, wanting to do good for the world, but when push comes to shove he cares about his people slightly more than Those Other People. I imagine him trying hard but not quite hard enough to avoid the temptation to see the Horde as monstrous Others. He succeeds. Mostly. But a few instances of seeing them as slight Other add up to the decision to go to war.
He probably tried to convince Sylvannas to return Lordaeron peacefully and offered some trade that he convinced himself was reasonable, but which seemed obviously insulting to her.
I imagine Sylvannas. Burnt out. Cynical. The Light - the beautiful force symbolizing tranquility and optimism that gives Anduin solace and the power to heal has literally forsaken her and left her a hollow husk of a person because it decided she was too broken.
[Aside: the saddest opening to World of WarCraft is playing as an undead priest. All the other race/class combos open with 'Now you are an Adult! Here is the path to greatness! Go off and kill some pigs!'.
The undead priest's mentor says 'We lie in a bullshit world. God explicitly has demonstrated that he does not love us. And we have to keep tending our flock anyway, giving them spiritual guidance in a world whose spirit and laws-of-physics are literally leaving us to rot. We will find a way, because we are too stubborn to die. But. Seriously, you're in for some bullshit]
For years, Sylvannas the Banshee Queen has been mistrusted by the humans and elves she used to call family, by the Horde who grudgingly let her hang around but made it clear the undead were only let in by Thrall's good graces.
She has worked hard to build a home for her people anyway.
She finally gets the respect she's wished for from the Horde. One too many Warchiefs died until she was the last one standing, right at the moment when she'd proven herself just enough for someone to give her the chance to lead.
The Horde is looking at her, expectantly, as Anduin offers some trade to get Lordaeron back. Not just an important symbolic city for the Horde, but her city, that she's worked so hard to build.
Of course she looks at Anduin and says "Seriously? Fuck you."
...
...I don't actually think this is the *most* likely timeline. In a world that wasn't warped by the need to Sell Expansions For Adventurers to Kill Things In, I think the most likely future is more like "Literal WarCraft gives way to EconomicCraft" where the Horde and Alliance compete without killing each other (as often).
But, it's a pretty likely timeline, with reasonable character motivations.
So, anyway, after thinking about all of that, I can't watch this cinematic without crying.
