If you’re on Twitter, you know that one of the favorite pastimes on Twitter is complaining about the “for you” feed, which is the one where you get served an infinite scroll of algorithmically chosen content. People complain about it constantly. “It’s goal is to make you angry” they say. “It only gives you content that upsets you” they say. “The algorithm is your enemy” they say.
These people are telling on themselves. The algorithm rewards engagement. It’s showing you the content that you engage with the most. When you reward rage-bait with attention, you get more rage-bait. If your feed is full of garbage, it’s because you keep interacting with garbage. My “for you” feed is great, because I only engage with content I like, so it gives me content I like from people I like.
The thing is - this is not just a twitter thing. It’s how all of life works. Whatever behavior you reward in the people around you is what you’ll get more of. If you reward people being calm and reasonable, the people in your life will be calm and reasonable more often, and you’ll attract people who like being calm and reasonable. If you reward histrionics, you’ll get more histrionics.
My friend Paola recently wrote a very good blog post (if you’ll ignore the evospych) about how a lot of mental health issues develop as a way of controlling one’s environment. If the only way to get someone to care about you is to kick and scream, you will (often not consciously) kick and scream when you need someone to care about you. If you’re the other person here, the play is to never create that situation. If you genuinely care about someone, make sure you demonstrate that care before it gets to that point. And if you don’t care, don’t jump into action just because they’re upset. It’s not your responsibility to “be there” for every person who is throwing a tantrum.
Your social life operates by the same algorithm as your social media. Whatever you give attention to, you’ll get more of. So make sure you’re giving your attention to the content you actually want.
[mirror of my blog post at https://livingwithinreason.com/p/the-algorithm-rewards-engagement]
If you’re on Twitter, you know that one of the favorite pastimes on Twitter is complaining about the “for you” feed, which is the one where you get served an infinite scroll of algorithmically chosen content. People complain about it constantly. “It’s goal is to make you angry” they say. “It only gives you content that upsets you” they say. “The algorithm is your enemy” they say.
These people are telling on themselves. The algorithm rewards engagement. It’s showing you the content that you engage with the most. When you reward rage-bait with attention, you get more rage-bait. If your feed is full of garbage, it’s because you keep interacting with garbage. My “for you” feed is great, because I only engage with content I like, so it gives me content I like from people I like.
The thing is - this is not just a twitter thing. It’s how all of life works. Whatever behavior you reward in the people around you is what you’ll get more of. If you reward people being calm and reasonable, the people in your life will be calm and reasonable more often, and you’ll attract people who like being calm and reasonable. If you reward histrionics, you’ll get more histrionics.
My friend Paola recently wrote a very good blog post (if you’ll ignore the evospych) about how a lot of mental health issues develop as a way of controlling one’s environment. If the only way to get someone to care about you is to kick and scream, you will (often not consciously) kick and scream when you need someone to care about you. If you’re the other person here, the play is to never create that situation. If you genuinely care about someone, make sure you demonstrate that care before it gets to that point. And if you don’t care, don’t jump into action just because they’re upset. It’s not your responsibility to “be there” for every person who is throwing a tantrum.
Your social life operates by the same algorithm as your social media. Whatever you give attention to, you’ll get more of. So make sure you’re giving your attention to the content you actually want.