I 26M find other people to be surreally unusual, and feel it necessary to search lesswrong for a sane and intelligent female partner.

To make it more than a pure ad, I'll describe what I mean exactly by "surreally unusual" and speculate as to why this is the case, to offer a case study to others.

Though I have always felt this way to some extent, I am beginning to very acutely feel that all others I interact with, no matter in what sphere online or offline I search for them, are some combination of unintelligent, including socially unintelligent, neurotic, lazy, and specifically fearful or sensitive. To the extent that I search for and find intelligent people, I find that they are often lacking in rationality, are neurotic, tend to very strongly embody certain "characters" such as "the Christian", "the feminist", "the secularist", etc, which regurgitate predictable viewpoints and sentiments from some propaganda network, and are really not so intelligent.

I often personally "possess myself of neuroticism", by which I mean, that I will think and act in ways quite intensely neurotic, for example by positing ridiculous spiritual entities, praying to said spiritual entities, or dancing around in an attempt to summon destinies from spiritual ether, but I believe that all of these are synthetic or learned behaviors, since I am quite certain while performing them that I am being ridiculous. Such thoughts and behaviors are usually motivated by boredom, desperation, or especially a feeling of things in the actual world being insufficiently powerful or efficient, to the extent that I cannot believe it, and feel the need to posit things which enable me to believe that the world is not wholly weak, boring, slow, etc. That is to say that such neuroticisms are symbolic representations of my ambitions. I do not believe, but sometimes I forget, that I am in any innate way neurotic or a neurotic thinker. Rather I am very strongly alienated from everything around me, and that is a coping mechanism.

Anyway, I believe there are two reasons for this state of affairs. The first is simply that I am very intelligent. The second, more interesting reason, I believe has to do with the influence of the internet, especially upon my generation. As follows:

-People are sensitive and neurotic because the internet strongly rewards whining. I am whining to you right now. In a competition for attention, load moaning is a pretty good tactic, and I don't believe it needs to be demonstrated that this constitutes a large proportion of online media. Not only does the internet consist of this type of media, but people are very involved in the internet, so that whining constitutes the primary form of propaganda that they habitually consume, and thus they are influenced to be whiners.

-People are often reticent, fearful, lazy, etc, because the internet provides them with a refuge, and for my generation that refuge is typically their default existence.

-People are socially unintelligent, especially in my generation, for the obvious reason that they are online all day, and perhaps especially because they grew up being online. It's not just a matter of the fact that they were looking at screens, but that they were alienated from a wider society and cloistered in their own youth enclave.

-Intelligent people are "characters" because the internet consists of a bunch of memetic enclaves, and algorithms frequently feed into whatever a person's current biases are. This phenomenon, I have noticed, extends also to unintelligent people, but such people are usually less vocal about being, e.g, "the feminist", and instead hold these views implicitly. Of course intelligent people are more likely to have detailed and articulated views. This causes an additional difficulty, I find, with unintelligent people, in that they do hold various views that could potentially trip up your relationship with them, but are covert about it, and you waste time talking to them only to step on whatever landmine, which they may not even explain to you unless you ask why they are suddenly irrationally angry.

It is worthwhile to the case study to mention that I have always used the internet in what I believe to be a non-standard way for my generation. That is, I have always hunted specifically for the information or connections I want, as I am presently doing, and have never passively boarded myself on to any platform, milieu, etc. I have never really derived any leisure from the internet and have always conceived of my actions as work.

I'm pretty attractive for what it's worth. I'm a laborer and therefore physically fit. It can be implied from my writing that I am a bit grandiose, narcissistic, etc, but I don't prefer to be this way any more than I prefer to live in a world inhabited by benevolent spirits, rather it is just a matter of fact that most people are unintelligent and incompetent, just as it is a matter of fact that the world in general is inefficient, slow, boring, etc.

I'm from the Northeast US though distances can easily be traveled.