Self-confidence and status

by [anonymous] 1 min read23rd Aug 201510 comments


I've seen the advice "be (more) confident" given so that the person may become more socially successful. For example self-confident get more raises. But I'm not sure if self-confidence is the cause of becoming more socially successful, or the result of it. I don't think self-confidence can be separated from social status. I see it more as an intersocial function that gives information to participants on who to follow or listen to, and you can't act fully confident in isolation with others and their feelings. Artificially raised confidence sounds really hard, and if possible it sounds more closer to arrogance or delusion and real confidence must have some connection to reality and knowledge of what kind of value you provide. I mean, delusion might work if those around you are delusional too, but that seems pretty risky and surer way is to just be connected to reality all the time. If what you're saying is not true or interesting, then it's hard to be confident when you're saying it and others will usually quickly notify in one way or another if what you're saying is not true or interesting. If the truth is that you can't really provide much value, then I can't see how you would be able to feel as confident as those who provide more value (note that value might sometimes be quite complex and not the first thing that comes into your mind, inept dictators might provide the kind of value that really makes sense in evolutionary context even though they seem to do nothing useful at all in reality)

So in short, self-confidence usually seems approximation of what kind of value you provide in the real world, where value is to be thought of as something that is beneficial in evolutionary context. There are some hacks to quickly raise your value, like dressing better or working out, but ultimately it comes down raising your value in the real world and confidence must follow that and not the other way around.

Thoughts? How does "fake it till you make it" strategy appears in this context?